Controversial thoughts

The word ‘hero’ is thrown around too casually these days, but if you think I’m a hero for saying these brave things, I don’t mind

I’ve been thinking for a while that electing the person who was simultaneously the stupidest person in America and the most psychopathic person in America to the nation’s highest office was a bad idea.

I know this may be controversial, but I don’t care. Next time, let’s mix it up. Elect a stupid person once, and then next time, elect an evil person. But we shouldn’t do both at the same time.

Along time same lines, I’ve recently been listening to the “Behind the Bastards” podcast, which a friend told me about. They just did a four-part series called “How Jeffrey Epstein Invented the Modern World.”

I mean, you think Jeffrey Epstein was just terrible because of the child r*ping and sex trafficking, and yes! He totally was! Child-r*ping was the worst thing about his misbegotten, miserable life.

But he also did so many other bad things he would still be one of the worse U.S. human beings of the 21st century — even if he hadn’t been a pedo! That’s impressive!

Cryptocurrency? He was an early investor! He was an active participant on 4chan! Did he invest in efforts to replace teachers with games and AI-generated slop? He did! Did he help fund the “Gamergate” controversy? Yes!

After a transgender woman sued him for r*ping her, he became so angry that he helped fund hateful anti-transgender news coverage!

From 2000 until he finally snuffed it in jail, this guy was the Zelig of enshittification. Every time something terrible happened that made social media, the Web or American society, Jeffrey Epstein was right around the corner, rubbing is hands and asking, “How can I make a profit from this?”

And yes, I said Zelig, rather than Forrest Gump, because it’s well documented that Epstein and Woody Allen were buddies — of course they were! Because if something bad happened, Jeffrey Epstein wanted to be a part of it.

Think of any American or Russian shitbag from the last 20 years. Jeffo was probably emailing them, likely with a lot of typos and misspelled words: ” hey budy lets do crmes, lol “

Anyway, this may be controversial, but I don’t care: To borrow a joke from Norm MacDonald, the more I hear about this Epstein fella, the less I care for him.

Start here, if you can stomach it:

There are four lights

It must be obvious by now, but just in case it isn’t: Everything the Trump Administration touches is going to be smeared with shit for the next three years.

The Kennedy Center, the Olympics — and now the Scouts.

Later this year, they’re going to smear July 4 with shit when they have a UFC championship on the White House lawn.

Instead of kids one day having fun memories of cartoons, fireworks and free concerts — like many Americans have of the Bicentennial in 1976 — the 250th Anniversary of the United States is going to be forever tainted by the specter of the shit-throwing madmen looming over it.

Nothing is going to be spared. But live your values and hold your line.

It’s literally the only thing you have control over — yourself, your self-respect and your integrity.

Hold the line for yourself, your family (including chosen family), and your friends.

Stay true to yourself. Have some self-respect. It’s the one thing these shit-stained Nazi morons can’t take away.

I mean, c’mon, my fellow Gen X nerds: We saw Capt. Picard overcome worse than this.

Was it over when Gul Madred tried to make Jean-Luc say there were five lights? Was it over when the Borg collective turned him into Locutus?

My God, those are the geekiest things I’ve ever written.

But no matter what these Nazi assholes say, THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS.

Be one of the lights.

People, people, we gotta get over before we go under

We got a funky president, and people, it’s bad

(This is political. If you’re tired of politics, skip to something else.)

Ann Telnaes cartoon via Substack

I didn’t watch Kaiser von Shitzenpants’ address to the Reichstag last night, but from everything I’ve read — someone called it “probably the most divisive State of the Union in history” — I think I’ve got the flavor of it.

None of what’s currently happening is going to end well for us in the United States. The pathways from here are pretty grim.

To be clear: I think the side of justice will ultimately win.

Continue reading “People, people, we gotta get over before we go under”

Post-apocalypse

Jeff Bezos doesn’t understand why people liked The Washington Post. Therefore, he might as well wreck it.

When I was barely making enough money to pay my rent and was eating Ramen noodles and bagged salad for dinner every night, I still scraped up enough money to buy a Sunday copy of The Washington Post every week.

Later, I subscribed to the weekly edition of the newspaper, and then, when it went online, the digital version.

For most American journalists in the 1990s and early 2000s — especially those of us aspiring to break into the business — The Washington Post was very nearly the platonic ideal of what you wanted a big-city newspaper to be. It had everything: Serious news coverage, biting editorial columns and cartoons, and a very lively “Style” section and Sunday magazine.

Continue reading “Post-apocalypse”

Top 55 of 1965

Thank you to everyone who tuned in New Year’s Eve to hear our broadcast from “December 31, 1965,” and special thanks to Scott Fybush, who recorded the news for us from the “Mutual Broadcasting” newsroom. Also thanks to WRCT for allowing me to pre-empt several shows, as well as Chief Engineer Carmen Ting and “Steve the Roach” of the Deep Blues Hour for technical support.

Very special thanks to my long-suffering wife, Denise, for keeping me plied with hot tea throughout the three hours, because if you listened, you know I had very little voice that week. I am slowly recovering from a bout of the “super flu” that turned into bronchitis.

One technical note you might find interesting —

Because I wasn’t feeling well, I decided to do the show from my home studio, rather than WRCT. Early on, when Steve and I were testing the remote feed, we realized there was approximately a 30 to 60 second delay from the time the audio was sent to the network and when it was broadcast over 88.3 FM. That was an obvious problem on a New Year’s Eve show, because you want to announce 12 midnight as close to accurately as possible.

On the night of the broadcast, in the room adjacent to my basement studio, I tuned one of my trusty Zenith Trans-Oceanic radios to WRCT, started a song on the CD player, and started a timer. Then I listened to the playback from the next room:

When I heard the song on the radio, I hit the button again. The delay on Dec. 31 was about 42 seconds.

At 11:56, I pulled up the NIST atomic clock (time.gov) on my laptop and when it counted down to 11:59:18 p.m., I said “happy new year!” and played the WRCT legal ID. Forty-two seconds later (the most important number in the universe is always 42, after all) we announced the new year, just as NIST flipped to 12:00:00. We were about as close as we could get.

Several people have asked if we will re-broadcast the show — I don’t think so, because my voice was so weak and raspy that I found it hard to listen to myself. I appreciate everyone who stuck with me.

But I may re-create it soon during some holiday weekend; follow me here or on social media (Facebook, Mastodon, Bluesky) to find out when I announce it. I have to kick this damned cough first.

“Pen Avenue” for December 2025

Here is December’s “Pen Avenue,” my cartoon for Print, Pittsburgh’s East End newspaper.

Sorry for the delayed posts — I’ve been sick for most of the last three weeks and things got away from me.

Print is not available online; you can only read it in (what else?) print. It’s available at Giant Eagle and other stores in Pittsburgh’s East End, or subscribe on the website.